Week #3 (4/28/10)

In class this evening, we discussed what "obstacles" present themselves to us when we attempt to sit still and quiet and focus in awareness with equanimity. The actual act of sitting still and quiet and focusing in awareness with equanimity is not difficult; in fact, it happens naturally and with ease once we actually sit down to practice. The difficult part for many of us is getting to the point of sitting down! Yes, some amount of commitment is necessary here, especially if you're not used to making the time to sit still and quiet. 

Constant thinking also appears to be an obstacle, but be careful about rationalizing around this - we human beings think - period. It's futile to try to shut down thinking while you're practicing - if that had worked, you'd have no need to get quiet in the first place! And besides, only thought would want to try to shut thought down: the mind says that you must quiet your thinking, and you must engage in trying to do that. Equanimity allows what already is to be, without trying to change it or resist it in any way: thinking arises, you become aware that you're engaged in it, identified with it, but because you are practicing equanimity, as soon as you're aware of being engaged in thinking, you immediately return your focus to inner sensation. You don't give the thinking a second thought! 

Compassion helps a lot. Explore having compassion for the "me" that constantly gets caught up in identification with thought - especially thought that occurs in the form of old, habitual, unhealthy patterns. When you focus in the awareness of sitting still and quiet with equanimity, you will actually "see" these thoughts. You will be able to see them because you are not completely caught up in them - you are able to see them because you are seeing from the perspective of focusing in awareness, and not from the perspective of thinking. In that moment of equanimity, you can sense deeply that you are not your thoughts, and the habitual identification with thinking gradually dissolves away, replaced by a sense of just being - alive, present, aware being.

Practice for this week: The whole purpose of practicing in these first four weeks is to build the capacity for focusing in awareness with equanimity while sitting still and quiet so you can then start applying this "tool" of focusing in awareness when you are actively engaged in your daily life. If you don't practice this now, if you don't build and strengthen this tool now, you won't be able to use the tool when you need it out in your daily life. Continue practicing at least once a day, sitting for at least 5 minutes. If you feel comfortable for sitting longer, then do it. If you feel you're sitting too long, decrease the time to comfortable level.

Week #2 Practice

Click on the Week #2 Practice link in the panel at the right for a 10 minute recording of our meditation practice during this week's class. You can listen to it for a helpful reminder for getting still, quiet, and focusing with equanimity.

Hi Ralph and class! I was practicing and have had difficulty with my thoughts distracting me. I have made up a mantra; "one" on the inhale, and "breath" on the exhale. I am still focusing on the cool air as it enters my nose and the warm air as it leaves; however, this little mantra helps me to maintain my focus on that "one breath at a time". I am noticing that I am better able to not get caught up in my thoughts and; therefore, am returning more quickly to the breath. Is this ok?

Week #2 (4/21/10)

This week we looked at how thought can create a sense of separation, and how the sense of separation creates feelings of incompleteness, not being whole, not being "enough," and the endless, futile seeking to get more so that we can feel enough. And we experienced that when we focus completely on the sensation (of breath or inner body energy) with equanimity, there is an allowing of all to be exactly as it is, and this creates a sense of wholeness, peace, "enoughness" - a recognition of present awareness - without the need for thought. 

Identification with the thought-created and thought-sustained sense-of-self is how we hold on to habitual patterns. This identification comes entirely from the past and gives us a sense of security: we apparently know who and what we are. But on closer examination, we see that who and what we think we are right now is coming from thought about who and what we were in the past! When the sense-of-self is not derived from thought, your life doesn't end - it becomes fresh! Life becomes simply being - alive, present, awareness.

Awareness is not some thing you can get from the outside and then own... awareness is inside, always present, always here, now. It simply takes a shift of perspective out of identification with the separate-seeming, thought-based sense-of-self into the sense of oneness of awareness. 

Practice for this week: Each day, for a 10 minute period, get still, quiet and focused on the sensation of either the breath inside the nostrils or the sensation of energy inside the hands - whichever is most comfortable and prominent for you. And remember that there is no goal to be reached - the practice itself is the goal.

Week #1 (4/14/10)

As we shared why we are interested in focusing in awareness, we reaffirmed that most human beings (and all of us in the class) currently experience a desire to either stop or control what we recognize as conditioned thinking: untrue/patterned/unhealthy beliefs, perceptions, concepts, stories, pictures, movies, etc. We saw that we quickly judge these thoughts, which only holds them in place with more thought, and judge ourselves for thinking these thoughts - a vicious circle! What to do?

It was suggested that struggling with, or trying to control or stop thought, only fuels thought and creates more, or secondary thought around the original thought. How can we stop fueling thought without fighting with it? Equanimity. Equanimity means being aware of thought without the reaction of judging, controlling, manipulating, doing, pushing away, denying, making stories, etc. Equanimity is allowing what already is to be as it is without doing something with it. Noticing sensations, thoughts or feelings with equanimity allows them to run their course as the temporary phenomena that they are: they rise up and they dissolve away, IF we don't hold onto them with more thought.

We start practicing equanimity by getting still, quiet and focused on a sensation (either the feeling of breath in the nostrils as we breathe, or the feeling of inner body energy or aliveness in our hands). We do this one breath at a time, focusing completely on the sensation. When we do this, some distraction will come - a different sensation, a noise from outside, a thought. Sooner or later, we will become aware that our focus is now directed toward that distraction. This is the crucial point of applying equanimity! How? By not giving the distraction a second thought... by applying the equation: distraction = return my focus to breath (or inner energy). And this becomes the practice: focusing with equanimity, one breath at a time.

Homework for Week #1: Practice getting still, quiet and focused on sensation with equanimity for at least five minutes, at least once a day. And during your day, when you are not sitting still and being quiet, begin to focus inside, on just one breath, and notice what happens.